Back Story
Sometimes, when you meet a person you feel an instantaneous spark, an automatic connection. I knew we were going to have something special the first time I saw him. The first few months of our relationship was the most genuine love I’ve ever experienced. We lived hours part (and then countries apart for a while) and would talk for hours every single day. We shared the deepest parts of each other. We helped each other through the most difficult times of our young lives.
We fought constantly, and always found our way back to each other. Except for this time.
This time it’s over for good, and I’ve accepted that.
He is happier when we don’t speak or acknowledge each other’s existence, so I’ve taken to writing down everything I want to tell him. Sometimes I want to call him to tell him about something that happened through out the day, sometimes I want to yell and scream at him.
It’s time to set my focus inward and heal.
avramizza said,
October 8, 2009 at 4:58 pm
christinerobyn said,
October 17, 2009 at 10:53 am
Writing helps a lot.
just another like you said,
October 12, 2009 at 3:23 pm
I feel like I have been living your journal. Reading it sounds like what I have been going through for the past year. I am glad you are doing better. I think I’m getting there, slowly. Thank you for allowing me to find this. It has actually helped.
christinerobyn said,
October 17, 2009 at 10:53 am
It sucks anyone else is going through this, but it helps to know we’re not alone. We will learn from this and it *will* get better.
Pam said,
August 17, 2010 at 10:13 am
Writing, music (for me), talking to friends…all helpful. Movement, any movement is good. Even if you feel like you’re moving backwards, as happens sometimes, it’s better than stagnating, getting stuck in your own rut, like car tires stuck in the mud you can’t move so you just sink. Yes, writing moves you and makes things clearer even if only for that moment in time. Eventually, writing moves you to another place….don’t stop writing.
christinerobyn said,
August 17, 2010 at 11:23 am
You write very well. Thank you for reminding me that I need to keep writing so that I don’t get ‘stuck in the mud’, as you put it.